I know what you’re thinking: Full Stop is going to the 2017 AWP Conference? No way! Full Stop is way too cool to go to AWP! And you’re right. We are way too cool to go to AWP. And if our moms weren’t threatening to stop paying our server fees, you’d be more likely to see us scalping counterfeits outside the Walter E. Washington Convention Center tomorrow than inside it, selling our souls, at table 754. But let’s get a few things straight: Yes, we will be at AWP tomorrow (fashionably late) through Saturday. Yes, we will be at table 754, which, by the way, is three more than 751, where n+1 will be. Yes, that will basically make us n+4, which is greater than n+1 for all real numbers n. And yes, we will have copies of Full Stop: The Book, as well as a limited quantity of posters and handmade screen-printed Cioran cat tees. But no matter what our moms say, no matter how much they beg, we will not, under any circumstances, be dressing up. And that’s final.

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