If Kelly Clarkson’s endorsement of Ron Paul is any predictor — and what anecdote isn’t in an election year — Dave Mustaine’s accidental endorsement of Rick Santorum should result in a 400% spike in Megadeth’s record sales. The real boon, though, falls to Santorum, who can now expect a strong turnout in the upcoming primaries from the coveted 13-17 year old white male voter demographic. But is it fair to call Santorum heavy metal’s candidate based on the strength of this high-profile endorsement alone?
Before he suspended his campaign in January, Jon Huntsman was widely considered to be the hardest man in the race. His encyclopedic knowledge of prog legend Captain Beefheart was considered “cool,” as was the fact that he dropped out of high school to play keys in a band called Wizard. What really set Huntsman apart, though, was his record as Governor. In 2007, he attended a Dream Theater concert in Salt Lake City and found it so awesome that he issued a proclamation declaring July 30th “Dream Theater Day” in Utah. So metal.
Has Santorum really taken up this mantle? A look beneath the surface reveals a candidate with little interest in catering to the metal voting bloc. While Mustaine’s homophobia, born again Christianity, and views on foreign policy may mesh well with the Santorum camp, he and Santorum’s shared hatred of Satan worship may alienate them from many metal fans. Perhaps more damning is Santorum’s negative view of promiscuous sexuality, a pastime many metal heads purportedly enjoy. And while the candidate may have an impressive collection of vests, he is yet to be seen in one of leather, worn open over his bare, glistening chest.
So who can rockers look to become the next Master of Reality, I mean President of the United States?
Ron Paul. While the Mustaine endorsement may have briefly put Santorum in the limelight, Paul has quietly been building up an impressive core of endorsers. This group includes Michale Graves of the Misfits, Aaron Lewis of nü-metal group Staind, Joe Perry of Aerosmith, and Jon Schaffer of Iced Earth, all of whom are considered to be much cooler than Mustaine, who is really kind of a wuss if you think about it. Paul can count on his most metal quality — his I-don’t-give-a-f*k Libertarianism — to win him more supporters in the future. However, it remains to be seen whether or not we will see more anointments from metal’s gods over the coming weeks, as many of them don’t care about politics or are British.
However things go in the next few weeks, I’ll be taking a road trip down to Tampa this August to work on my new documentary film, Republican National Convention Parking Lot.
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